Negroes

African-Americans usually invent genres. In fact, they nearly always do.
Let's take a look back through time, shall we...

Rock and Roll - Circa. 1951

Cited as the first Rock and Roll record is Jackie Brenston and His Delta Cats and the song "Rocket 88". While it was written by a 19-year old Ike Turner, the song was recorded in 1951. Fusing together Blues, Gospel, Country and some fucking attitude, Mr. Turner formed the best thing ever. This initial style was then developed upon by some of my personal loves in life: Chuck Berry, Little Richard and a lil' black man called Bo Diddley.

And now, from the sweetest of sexual innuendos, dancing and black people, Rock is now a shitty scum where people like Nickelback and Hoobastank think they are king shit. They need to get Leadbelly'd.

Jackie Brenston and His Delta Cats - Rocket 88



Funk - Circa. 1964
Personally, I believe Funk is the blackest genre of all time. It's just so fucking sweet. Funk was born when some ultra-smooth men brought together only the best elements of Soul, Jazz and R&B and took away pretty much all importance of melody and harmony and totally emphasised the mega-importance of groove and rhythm. They made music to:

1. Dance with that fly honey
2. Hit on said honey
3. Buy said honey a drink
4. Take said honey home
5. Make sweet, sweet love to said honey

Fuck yes.
Now, the word "funk" was originally coined to describe the scent of sexual intercourse. Hot. For Funk, we can thank James Brown and his downbeat characteristic and then some fine pioneers of Sly & The Family Stone, George Clinton and good 'ol Bootsy Collins.

Sly & The Family Stone - Family Affair



PS. Grand Funk Railroad are not Funk. We're An American Band is a good song, though...

Soul - Circa. 1954
Soul was R&B but with heavy influence of Gospel harmonies and chorus. Soul music rose out of "The black experience in America through the transmutation of gospel and rhythm & blues into a form of funky, secular testifying." Great quote. It's upbeat (usually), has hand-claps, stupid bodily movements and some awesome call and response. Ray Charles is often called the inventer of soul but James Brown is the Godfather of Soul. For soul, we can bow our heads to Aretha Franklin and Fats Domino.

Also, Blue-Eyed Soul gets a special mention because I like Dexys Midnight Runners a fair but. Blue-Eyed Soul is them white-ass crackers trying to be black. Blue-Eyed Soul sucks except for Dexys and Dusty Springfield. They made 3 brilliant albums and she's fantastic and I don't care what you have to say.

Ray Charles - I Got A Woman



Rhythm & Blues (R&B) - Circa. 1948
I really, really like R&B. It's an amazing genre with some of the best music ever coming from it. The term "Rhythm and Blues" replaced "Race Music" in the late 40s as a marketing tool to sell it and to be less racist. It was a general term at first but transformed into a full-blown genre thanks to Louis Jordan. R&B was urbane, jazz-based music with a contant beat that was infectious to listen to. My personal favourite R&B musicians are Curtis Mayfield, Stevie Wonder, Marvin Gaye and Booker T. & The MG's.

Unfortunately, R&B has become RnB, a shitty genre invented by black people (a rarity, folks) and is pretty much my mortal enemy in life. Fuck you, Chris Brown.

Booker T. & The MG's - Mo' Onions



Rap / Hip-Hop - Circa. 1978
I like Hip-Hop more than rap. I like Hip-Hop because it's fun, funky and fresh and the 4 elements are something I totally admire. A good MC is something difficult to be, and to be a DJ requires a rare feel for the beats and rhythm. I respect a talented MC and lyricist (Hello GZA/Genius). Hip-Hop culture began in The Bronx and was first used by Grandmaster Flash and The Furious Five. Fuck yes, they are the originators of all things hip-hop happenin'.

So yeah, the 4 elements are:

• Turntablism
• MCing
• Breakdancing
• Graffiti

Hip-hoppers I dig the most are from the Golden Age (Late 80s and early 90s): Public Enemy, Jungle Brothers, A Tribe Called Quest and the ones who said a DJ could be a band, Run-D.M.C.

Public Enemy - Welcome To The Terrordome


Jazz - Circa. Pretty much 1808
Jazz is an interesting genre, which spanned from Ragtime songs. It was the style developed upon by all the musical members of African-American slave communities. The first printing of Jazz was "Jelly Roll Blues" by Ferdinand "Jelly Roll" Morton, printed in 1915.

Jazz is just too much to talk about, so I'll stick to what I know. Miles Davis is a beast on the trumpet and invented Jazz Fusion in 1969 with Bitches Brew and pretty much all good jazz musicians are black. Bar Dave Brubeck and his quartet - aka. Take Five. Fantastic.

Miles Davis - Blue In Green



So, all in all, black people are awesome and this post is really something I'm proud of and I didn't even use the world nigger once...oops...