I'm not an insomniac, I just can't sleep.
Please please please help me Sigur Rós, take away the pain of being awake. It is definitely not the time for this. Heavy air crushing my face into the firm pillow. That's not what I want. Please, Decoder Ring, help me reach my subconscious. No breeze and sweaty feet, uncomfortable situations with the ringing of damaged ears and silence. Please, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, let me find the Holy Grail that is peace and serenety in sleep. Itchy, itchy, why am I so itchy? My skin is dry as a desert, but elsewhere it's damp. Please, Tortoise, remove my thoughts and bring death to this day. It's still early at 12:40, I've got a long way to go yet. Hello, HSC, thank you for destroying my life for the time being. Look at what you've reduced me to. Please, Portishead, just take me away from life already. The frogs are so loud, I can hear them in my brain. How come when there's no noise, I can still hear sound? Please, Massive Attack, just put me to sleep! I need to sleep so I can attak the days ahead with mental vigour. Assault my exams with knowledge. Beat the expectations and release the pressure that weighs me down into the ground. You make me happy that we exist, detracting the grind from the current life. Adding spice and flavour to my soul. And to the other, thank you so. You are there when I need you most. Never leave, because if you do, I will surely fade into obscurity. Sorry. Please do not expect too much, I do not have the capacity to forge a life that may match your successes. Other, stern, problems abound, supportive in the desperate times, yet crushing my will. I apologise because you put your faith into me. Let me go my own way into the big bad world. When the lids close, it's hurts...will I never rest? Please, metal, join even closer, for the chemistry...chemistry! You plague my thoughts, yet I love you, so. Mathematics, the bane of my existence. Damn you ancestors! A blob of text is hard to read, I apologise once more.
Wherever you are, you are...
PS. This is not a suicide note.
5 years ago